Moving On
by ashleymac
Summary: Sequel to The Right Thing Brooke has been gone for two months and we're all moving on. Or trying to at least.
1. Recent Past

**A/N: Hey guys! I'm back. So this is going to be a sequel to "The Right Thing." It starts 2 months after her death, however, there will be flashbacks which will be in Italics. Hope you all enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters that belong to OTH, Mark, or The CW. I just own the idea and maybe a few people here and there.**

**Haley's POV**

Dear Journal,

Brooke has been gone for two months and we're all moving on. Or trying to, at least. Everything is starting to get back to normal, or as normal as they ever are here. Taylor left about a month after the accident. She said that the whole thing made her realize how important life is, so she's going to be with her family. I personally don't see that lasting for long. I'm still involved with the church group and have been spending a lot of time with Nathan. He really is a great guy. I don't know how I would have made it through the last couple of months without him. What about Peyton you might ask? She and I don't speak anymore. Anyway I should go.

Hales

**General POV**

_Six is normally a nice round number. But when your group is supposed to consist of 7 extremely close people six seems so small. _

_The group of friends sat near the back at Karen's. It was the first time they had all really been together since the funeral. This was the first step in moving forward with their lives. No one said anything for the longest time._

"_Well if we get any louder, they'll throw us out of this place," Taylor said trying to lighten the mood. Nathan and Lucas chuckled a little bit, Rachel and Peyton both gave a small smile, but Haley just sat there staring out the window. _

_The other five sat there looking at her with worried eyes._

"_Haley, come on. You have to talk to us sometime." Lucas said gently trying to nudge the girl out of her daze. Even though she had made peace at with Brooke earlier that week, she still couldn't find the energy to enjoy life the way she used to._

"_Yeah, Hales. Brooke wouldn't want you to be like this." Peyton said touching Haley's hand gently._

_Haley jerked her hand away and glared at the tall blonde. "Don't. You don't know what it's like to lose someone that you love so completely." Haley shot out before she realized what she was saying._

_Peyton scoffed, then her eyes got deathly cold. "Don't ever tell me that I don't know what it's like. I've lost two moms and my best friend in the world." The tone in which she was speaking could scare the toughest of Pirates. "Don't you dare tell me that I don't know what it's like to lose someone that you love some completely that you can't breathe without them. Contrary to what you seem to believe we all loved Brooke. Some of us just had better ways of showing it."_

"_Peyt, c'mon." Rachel said trying to calm the pissed off blonde._

"_No." Peyton said brushing off Rachel's attempt. Keeping her eyes dead locked on Haley she continued. "You know what Haley I do know what it's like. But you know what I don't know? I don't know what it's like to have that person's blood on my hands. I don't know what it's like knowing that all I had to do to save their life was tell them how much they meant to me. So . . . why don't you share with us. How does that feel?"_

_Everyone at the table held the same expression: wide eyes, mouth agape, and shock written all over their bodies._

"_Go to hell." Haley said as she got up and ran out of the diner._

_Nathan looked at Peyton then shook her head disappointedly then took off after Haley. _

_Everyone else just sat at the table speechless._

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_A few days after the fight between Haley and Peyton, all of Brooke's closest friends were called into a classroom to speak to a counselor._

"_Hi, my name is Christy White." The middle-aged woman said to the five teenagers sitting in front of her. "Today we're going to try and vocalize some of feelings about the recent passing of Ms. Davis. If at any time any of you don't feel comfortable don't worry. So who wants to start?" She asked as she looked from the two boys, to a red head girl, to two visible upset young ladies._

_Lucas shyly lifted his hand that he would start. "I guess I can. I mean I don't really know what I'm supposed to say though." He said looking at the woman for answers._

"_Whatever you want. The point of this is to be able to vocalize whatever you're feeling over this situation."_

_Lucas nodded than began to speak. "She died too young. She had so much more ahead of her. A whole life of greatness. I know that I was forever changed for knowing her. Even if we weren't all that tight. It just makes me understand and see how fragile life can be." Lucas said with a small smile and final nod._

"_Thank you Lucas." Ms. White said looking around the room silently asking for the next person to speak._

"_She was robbed." Rachel said. "She was robbed of what could have been because the roads were wet and she couldn't stop. Brooke and I had our ups and downs but I always respected her. She didn't deserve to die like this. She was better than that."_

"_I agree with both Rachel and Lucas. She died too young. Leaving behind people who care more than they could ever say." Nathan said glancing over at Haley._

"_Pointless. Unnecessary." Peyton said looking past the woman standing in front of her to the wall behind her._

"_Stupid." Haley said._

_Christy looked between the two girls trying to figure out which one to address first. "Peyton would you like to add more to that? Explain a little bit?"_

"_Her death. It didn't have to happen. She died because she was running away from a pain that only she could cause." Peyton said looking directly at Haley._

"_She died because she wanted something from me that I couldn't give." Haley shot back._

"_Whoa hold on." Christy said stepping in before there was another death. She looked into the pleading eyes of the other 3 teenagers who seemed to be asking her to talk to the girls separately. "Haley and Peyton. I would like for each of you to come to private sessions so we can discuss how you are feeling without having to worry about the feelings or judgments of others."_

_Both girls nodded that they agreed to come._

"_Ok. You guys can go back to class now."_

_The five broken teens slowly got out of their chairs and left the classroom._

"_This is gonna take a lot of work." Christy thought to herself as she watched them leave._

**Ok that's chapter 1. I hope you guys enjoyed it. Let me know if you think I should continue or what not. Sorry that this chapter was so short. As far as, couples go: I'm not going to say at this point. Because right now, it really isn't the focus. But I do promise there will be some soon. **


	2. Looking Back

**So I'm back for chapter 2 of "Moving On." Thanks to everyone who reviewed the first chapter. I hope you all continue to enjoy this story. As always, reviews make me happy. So um, review? Cuz a happy Ashley is a Ashley who is more inclined to update. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the OTH characters. Or any songs that might be mentioned along the way. Or any lines that might be taken from other shows. **

"_Come in," Christy called politely when she heard the light knock on her office door._

_Peyton slowly opened the door and walked in. _

"_Hi. Nice to see you Peyton." Christy said in a genuinely sweet tone. "You can sit down and make yourself comfortable." She said gesturing toward a big chair and a soft looking couch._

_Peyton looked between the two chairs like it was the hardest choice she'd ever have to make, then finally decided on the couch. She sat on the end farthest from Christy and looked around the office, doing anything she could do to avoid eye contact._

_Christy watched the young girl for several minutes making notes on her yellow legal pad before she said anything. "How are you Peyton?" She asked._

"_I'm fine thanks, and you?" Peyton said giving the answer she's been telling everyone for the past few weeks. The truth was she was anything but fine._

"_Are you really? Fine I mean?" Christy asked trying to nudge the girl into opening up a little bit._

_Peyton looked at the older woman not knowing what to say then decided to go with the first thing that popped into her head. "My best friend just died a senseless death because her good for nothing girlfriend who put her through hell for the past couple years, who claims to love her more than anything, wouldn't say anything to her when she asked how she felt about her. Yes. I'm just peachy." Peyton spat out at the older woman not meeting her eyes._

_Christy just sat silent leaving the floor open for Peyton to talk. When Peyton hadn't said anything for about 5 minutes, Christy spoke up. "Her girlfriend?"_

_This simple prompting sent Peyton over the edge. "Yes her girlfriend, if you could really call her that. Haley James." Peyton started pure hatred dripping from every word that came out of her mouth. "Haley broke Brooke on more than one occasion then always came back with 'I'm sorry Brooke. I love you Brooke.' And since Brooke really did truly love that girl, God only knows why she did, she always took her back, believed that it would be different. Just because Haley said so. But every time Haley hurt her. And guess who was there to pick up the pieces. Me. That's who. Haley knew that Brooke would always take her back. That's why she treated her like shit. She knew that she could use Brooke's feelings against her. You know what I think? I think that Haley never did love her half as much as she said she did. I think that Haley just used Brooke. She liked the way Brooke treated her. Hell . . . who wouldn't. Brooke treated her like a queen. So Haley stayed around. She loved the way Brooke loved her . . . but she didn't love Brooke. So time and time again she pulled her in. Sucked her in like a vacuum only to drop her like yesterday's trash. It got worse and worse every time." Peyton continued wiping away at the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes. "Brooke got more and more desperate. She didn't want Haley to lie to her. All she wanted was a straight answer from her. But no Haley was too, God damned selfish to give her that. Brooke . . . she deserved so much better. I'm not exactly sure what happened that day but I do know that Brooke when over to try one more time to talk to Haley and from what I've heard Haley wouldn't say anything. So Brooke died thinking that Haley didn't love . . . didn't need her . . . didn't want her. I'll never forgive her for that. I can't." Peyton said finally finished. _

_Christy had to fight back tears. This was the first time in all her years of working with teens in crisis that she felt so much raw emotion and passion coming from someone. She swallowed past the lump in her throat before she started to speak. "What about you Peyton? How do you feel?"_

_Peyton looked at her like she was more clueless than Paris Hilton in Wal-Mart. "I just told you."_

"_No, you didn't. Nothing in that was really about you. It was all about Brooke and/or Haley."_

_Peyton stared at her thinking about everything she said and realized that Christy was right. Peyton looked down at the ground. "I don't know. All I know is I miss my Brookie." Peyton said not being able to hold back the tears any longer._

"_Peyton it's ok. Some times in situations like these it is hard to know exactly what you're feeling." Christy said then looked at her watch. "Listen our time is about up but this is what I want you to do. I want you to start keeping a journal. I want you to write in it every day. A lot of times Journaling helps people express how they're feeling. Can you try that for me?" Peyton nodded that yes she would. "Ok. Good. I'll see you at the same time next week."_

**Present Time**

Rachel stood at the door to Peyton's room, a place she had become familiar with over the past two months. She watched Peyton write in her leather bound journal that she now wrote in every day. Rachel wondered what exactly Peyton wrote in there but they never talked about it.

"Hey you," Rachel said as she walked the rest of the way into her bedroom.

"Hi," Peyton said closing the journal and placing it on her night stand.

"How's it going?" Rachel asked taking her normal spot at the foot of the bed. "Have fun with Christy today?" She asked sticking out her tongue.

"It's going swell. And you know I always have a rockin time with Christy," Peyton said wiggling her eyebrows.

"Ew gross. Mental picture I so did not need. Never say anything like that again." Rachel said shaking her head trying to rid herself of the horrifying image.

"It is kinda disturbing isn't it?" Peyton said wrinkling her nose. Rachel nodded in agreement. "Sorry. But seriously it was good. I think next week will be my last session. It's kinda weird but I'm going to miss them."

"Yeah. Remember when you used to hate it? You thought it was the stupidest thing ever. Oh and when she told you to keep that journal you nearly had a cow when you were telling me about it."

Peyton smiled remembering all too well. "Yeah but now . . . I don't know. I think it actually kinda helped some."

"Yeah I think it did too. That and having an awesome person like me around of course." She said playfully.

Peyton smiled, a true heartfelt smile. "You know it. I don't know what I would have done without you, Rach. You probably saved my life."

Rachel looked down at the bedspread. She loved seeing Peyton but she was painfully aware of how true her last statement was. _What would I have done if I had lost her?_

**Flashback**

_Rachel ran to her car as soon as the dismissal bell rang. Peyton hadn't been to school that day and she had a horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach. Rachel jumped into her car and drove as fast as she could to Peyton's house. **God please let her be ok**. She thought when she finally pulled up to the girl's house and ran in._

_She could hear music coming from Peyton's room which was completely normal. However the song that was filling her ears made the dread in her stomach turn to pain. "Broken," filled her ears as she got closer to Peyton's room. The closer she got the worse her feeling became. **Please God. Please.**_

_Rachel bounded up the last couple of steps and threw open the door to Peyton's room. She was relieved to see Peyton sitting on the other side of the bed facing the window. **Thank God she's ok.** However, her relief didn't last for long as she looked around the room. What she saw made her stomach turn. The tall blonde's room was completely spotless, something that had never happened. She quickly recalled something she had been taught in health class. **Someone who is thinking of suicide gets things in order.**_

"_Peyton," she said walking toward the other girl. Peyton didn't move. "Peyton!" Rachel screamed, fear flooding through her body. When she reached the other side of the bed, she saw an empty prescription bottle on the floor._ _"Oh no. God no. Peyton." Peyton finally moved her eyes to look at Rachel._

"_Sweetie look at me. Where are the pills?" She asked tears flowing out her eyes. Peyton opened her hand. Rachel looked down and saw two months of anti-depressants in her hands. Rachel immediately knocked them out of the other girl's hand._

_As the pills hit the floor, tears began to fall from Peyton's eyes. Slowly at first but after a few seconds Peyton's silent cry turned into a gut wrenching sob. Her entire body shook violently, she was crying so hard._

_Rachel quickly sat on her knees in front of her, wrapping her arms protectively around the broken girl. "Shh, shh, I'm here now. It's ok. I'm here now." Rachel said trying to calm her._

"_It's not ok. I'll never be ok again. I miss her so much." The words came out in broken spurts. "I need her and she's gone."_

_Rachel tightened her grip. "It's ok Peyton. I'm here and I'm not going to leave you. You can't give up. It's going to get better. I promise." Rachel had never been more heartbroken then she was at that moment holding Peyton, knowing there was nothing she could do to help her._

**End Flasback.**

"Hey, you ok?" Peyton asked the suddenly silent girl at the end of her bed.

"Yeah I'm good." Rachel answered trying so desperately to forget that day. " So Karen's for dinner or what?"

"Umm we always do Karen's. How about Pizza Hut or something?" _Plus Haley is probably there and I really don't wanna deal with her._

"Works for me. Let's go." Rachel said getting up off the bed and pulling the blonde with her.

**XXXXXXXXXX**

Haley walked toward the intersection that had become her worst enemy a little over two months ago. She didn't know why but she still felt drawn to that place. The only sign of the accident was a small cross on the side of the road. The glass was gone and the light pole had been fixed. But there was still something about this place that drew her back. No matter what she told anyone or how she acted . . . she still felt incredibly guilty for everything that had happened.

It wasn't just Brooke's death any more that she felt guilty for. Her guilt now included Peyton's near death. Of course it wasn't her fault per say . . . but if Brooke was still alive it never would have happened. _If Rachel hadn't have gotten there when she did, the lives of two people would be over because of me._ The thought literally sent a chill down her spine.

"It isn't your fault." Nathan said from behind her.

"I know that here," she gestured to her head, "but not here," she said pointing at her heart.

"I know." He said coming up behind her wrapping his strong arms around her. "It just takes time." Haley leaned into his embrace. "How was your meeting with Christy today?"

"Just like every other one. It doesn't help Nathan. I'm afraid nothing ever will."

"It will. You just have to let it. You have to forgive yourself, Haley. No one blames you for any of this. Even Peyton. I think she's past it. Now you just have to forgive yourself. Let it go. Let yourself heal."

"I don't know. I just . . . I don't know."

"Ok." He said knowing now was not the time to push it. "You hungry? Why don't we grab some food?"

"Sounds good to me. Anywhere but Karen's."

"Yes ma'am." He agreed with a smile that could make the sun melt.

**As always tell me what you think.**


	3. Please Not Again

**Hey guys back with chapter 3. Sorry it is taking so long between chapters. I've been kinda busy but kinda lazy at the same time. Also I want to make sure this story is good because yeah. Oh yeah before I forget…I'm starting to think about couples for this story…you guys haven't given much input on that so tell me what you'd like to see, keep in mind I might listen and I might not. Lol. As always please review.**

Peyton looked out the passenger window as Rachel pulled her black Tahoe into the Pizza Hut parking lot. Rachel parked the car, turned off the engine, and then opened her door.

"You coming?" She said looking at the blonde who hadn't moved an inch.

Peyton jumped a bit when she heard Rachel speak. "Yeah. Sorry." She said smiling shyly as she opened her own door and exited the car.

"You ok?" Rachel asked once Peyton got beside her and they started to the front door.

"Yeah I'm good I just kind of zoned out there."

"I noticed." Rachel said with a playful smile. That smile faded when they reached the sidewalk and could see in the windows of the restaurant.

"What? What's wrong?" Peyton asked noticing the sudden change in mood of her friend.

"That." Rachel answered as she nodded toward the table in the far corner of the restaurant which was occupied by Nathan and Haley. Peyton let out a groan when she saw the two. "You want to go somewhere else?" Rachel asked already heading back toward her SUV.

"Not really. I'm hungry and I had my heart set on pizza." Peyton said to a visibly shocked Rachel.

"Are you sure you want to stay?" Rachel asked confused by the sudden change, since the accident Peyton had done everything in her power to avoid Haley.

"Yes I'm sure. We can just be sure to sit on the other side of the place. What are the chances of us actually having to talk to them?"

"Well knowing our luck pretty high." Rachel said with a light laugh.

"You're right. But even if we do I promise not to be mean." Peyton said giving her best innocent smile.

"You swear? I don't want a repeat of last time." Rachel said jokingly but meaning every word.

"Yes now can we just go eat?"

"Yes I guess." Rachel said reluctantly.

"Good. I'm starved." Peyton said already dragging the redhead inside.

_Please God don't let there be a repeat of last time._ Rachel thought as the entered the restaurant.

_Rachel, Peyton, and Lucas sat the table closest to the front of Pizza Hut. It had been 3 weeks since the fight at Karen's and 2 weeks since Haley and Peyton had started their personal sessions with Christy. The three of them were smiling and laughing more than they had been in recent weeks._

"_I'll be right back," Peyton said as she got up and headed toward the bathroom._

"_She seems to be doing better." Lucas said with a small smile._

"_Yeah I think she is." Rachel said returning the smile. "I'm just glad she's finally leaving her house with me having to drag her."_

"_Me too." Lucas agreed as the bell over the front door rang. He looked up to see Nathan and Haley walk in. "Hey guys." He said waving them over to their table._

"_Hey Luke. Rachel." Nathan said. Haley just smiled and nodded._

"_How's it going?" Rachel said nicely praying that things would go smoothly when Peyton returned from the bathroom. Just because Peyton had agreed to come didn't mean that she would be pleasant to Haley if she happened to see her._

"_It's going good." Nathan said answering for the two of them. "We're just picking up some lunch."_

_By this time Peyton was making her way back from the bathroom. When she noticed the standing by her table she rolled her eyes. **She couldn't even wait until Brooke was cold in her grave before she moved on.**_

"_I thought I smelled murder." Peyton said when she got back to her group._

_**This is not going to be pretty.** Rachel thought._

"_Seriously, Peyton, come off it," Haley said rolling her eyes. "You just can't get over the fact that Brooke preferred me over you."_

"_Exactly it has nothing to do with the fact that you killed her in more ways than one," Peyton seethed back. _

"_Whatever Peyton," Haley said moving closer to the taller girl, invading her personal space. "We all," she continued gesturing around their group of friends, "know you wanted her and never got over that you just couldn't have her."_

"_I'd suggest that you back up right now if you value your pathetic excuse of a life," Peyton shot back._

"_Oh, I hit a nerve didn't I Sawyer," Haley said not backing down at all._

_Peyton laughed. Not a happy laugh but a sadistic laugh that would cause pirates to shake. "No, but I'm about to hit something if you don't' back the fuck off and I promise it will hurt a lot worse than hitting a nerve." _

_As soon as Peyton finished her last sentence Rachel jumped out of her seat. "Hey guys, calm down," Rachel said trying to defuse the situation. Neither of the other two girls even moved at her attempt. Their eyes were still locked, breathing heavy, and both had looks on their faces that said they were ready to rip the other to shreds at any minute._

_Rachel gave Nathan a look begging for help. "Hey Hale's let's go." He said softly to Haley as he touched her shoulder. This caused her to break eye contact with Peyton._

"_Fine," she said letting him lead her away._

"_Bitch didn't even wait until Brooke was cold in her grave before she started sleeping with him," Peyton spit out angrily, loud enough for Haley to hear._

_Haley stopped cold in her tracks. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about." Haley said not turning around._

"_Oh what? Did you start sleeping with him before you even broke up with her?" _

_This set Haley off. She quickly turned and lunged for Peyton's neck taking the taller girl off guard and knocking her to the floor. Peyton used her long legs to give her self the upper hand. She flipped them where she was on top and laying into Haley. A punch with her right then her left then her right again. Haley finally got a hold of Peyton's hair and pulled down which caused the taller girl to not be able to punch her anymore._

"_Lucas!! Nathan!! Do something." Rachel yelled knowing that there was no way she could possibly pull the two apart now that they had a hold of each other. She stood there in shock as the two girls unloaded months and months of built up anger and aggression on each other._

_Lucas and Nathan snapped out of their daze when they heard Rachel yelling at them. Lucas wrapped his arms around Peyton's waist and pulled as Nathan got a hold of Haley. It was surprisingly difficult for the boys to pull them apart considering their size compared to both girls._

_Rachel walked over to Peyton and took her face in between her hands to make sure she could hear her. "Calm down. Brooke…she wouldn't want you to do this." Peyton finally stopped fighting Lucas. "Come on Lucas help me get her to my car." Lucas started out of the restaurant. "You got her?" Rachel asked looking at Nathan who was holding on to a visibly beaten Haley. _

"_Yeah. We're good. You go ahead." _

"_Alright. Call me and let me know if there's anything I can do."_

"_I will," Nathan said with a sad smile._

_Rachel made her way to the front counter to apologize to the manager before going back out to her truck._

"So this is going surprisingly well," Rachel said to Peyton who was sitting across the table from her. Rachel had purposely made Peyton sit with her back to the rest of the restaurant.

"I told you it would." Peyton said smiling at the redhead sitting across from her. The two sat in silence for a few minutes looking at each other. They had been spending hours a day with each other for the past few months and had gotten closer than either had ever expected possible.

Rachel was the first to look away with a shy smile. "So I um…I'm going to go pay." She said trying to find a way to get away from the blonde girl who was driving her way in a good way that can only be described as very bad.

"Um…ok. Just let me finish my soda and I'll be right there." Peyton said giving her friend a weird look.

"Ok just take your time." Rachel said getting up making her way toward the cash register. In the time she had been staring at Peyton she hadn't noticed that Nathan and Haley had gotten up themselves.

"Hey Rachel." Nathan said when she got to the register.

"Oh hi Nate. What's up?"

"I'm just paying. You here with Peyton?" He asked already knowing the answer because he had watched them debate on whether or not to even stay.

"Yeah I am. You here with Haley?"

"Yeah she's in the restroom. Where's Peyton?"

"She's finishing her soda." Rachel said turning to the cashier to pay the bill. "How's she doing?"

"To be honest I really don't know." Nathan said. "What about Peyton?"

"I actually think she's doing better." Rachel answered with a proud smile.

"Good. Uh oh." Nathan said nodding toward a meeting that was about to take place.

Peyton was walking toward the cashier and Haley was coming out of the bathroom. No matter what happened now the two were sure to cross paths. The two met up and both girls froze and looked at each other.

"Hi," Haley squeaked obviously nervous. _I wish we weren't fighting._

"Hey," Peyton responded with no emotion. _I know I should be over it but I can't stomach talking to you._

"I'm going over there." Nathan said as soon as he saw them start talking.

"No don't," Rachel said putting a hand on his arm to stop him. "Let's see what happens. They have to learn to be civil without supervision at some time."

"You're right." Nathan said taking a step back to watch.

"You here with Rachel?" Haley asked trying to start some sort of civil conversation. _Please just talk to me. We haven't had a civil conversation in months._

"Yes. You here with Nate?" Peyton asked already knowing the answer but not knowing what else to say. _Don't look at me like that. You've caused this rift between us._

"Yeah I am." _Please don't yell at me about it. He's the only person I have left._ "How're you doing?" _Please be doing ok. Please say that you're getting better. I couldn't handle losing you too._

"I'm doing ok." _That's the first time I've said that and it actually be true. _"What about you?" _I don't even know why I'm asking. I don't really care._

"I'm fine." _I'm anything but. But I can tell you don't care. _"Well I guess I'll let you go. See you around." _I really wish things were different._ Haley turned and walked away making her way to Nathan.

"Ok…that was weird." Peyton said as she slowly met up with Rachel.

"What? Talking to Haley without being a bitch?" Rachel asked sticking her tongue out.

"Yeah." Peyton said.

"Well I'm glad that you weren't a bitch. It means that my Peyton is growing up. I'm so proud."

"Well then what more could I ask for?" Peyton said giving her a big grin as she walked over to the passenger side and got in.

"Nothing."

**XXXXXXXXXXX**

Haley walked up to her room after Nathan dropped her off. She laid back on her bed with a heavy sigh, thinking about the past few months.

"Well at least she didn't beat the crap out of me this time," Haley said to the empty room with a sad smile.

_Haley knocked on the door to Christy's office two days after the fight with Peyton at Pizza Hut._

"_Come in," Christy called sweetly._

_Haley turned the knob slowly and walked in. She took a seat in the middle of the couch._

"_My goodness Haley. What happened to you?" Christy asked taking in the black right eye, cut about her left eye, and swollen lip, she had obviously not heard about the fight._

_Haley looked down at her hands and then back up at Christy. "Peyton."_

"_Excuse me?" Christy asked clearly shocked._

"_We kind of had a fight. She did this." Haley said pointing at her face._

"_Well would you like to tell me what happened?" Christy asked as she made a note to ask Peyton about it._

"_Well she was eating with Rachel and Lucas. Nathan and I came in. Words were said. I was going to leave then more words were said then I attacked her. Then she got a hold of me. The end."_

"_What was said Haley?"_

"_She called me a murder. This is nothing new so it didn't really bother me. Then I said that she was just jealous because Brooke always picked me over her basically. She then told me to back off which I didn't do until Nathan told me to. Then she made a comment about me and Nathan that set me off." Haley said all of this without making eye contact._

"_What did she say about you and Nathan?" Christy asked trying to get something out of the teenage girl who was becoming one of her most difficult patients. _

"_She said that I didn't wait until Brooke was cold in her grave before I started sleeping with him. Which is insane because I'm not with him like that. I tried to tell her that, but she wouldn't listen, she just insinuated that I had started cheating on Brooke with him before anything ever happened." Haley paused for a moment before she continued. "I may have been a lot of bad things to Brooke but I would never cheat on her."_

_Christy nodded. "What about Peyton?"_

"_What about her?" Haley asked taken aback by the question._

"_What are your thoughts on her? Do you want to mend that relationship?"_

"_I think Peyton loved Brooke very much and could never deal with the fact that I got to be with Brooke in a way that she never did. I totally understand why Peyton blames me. Do I want to mend the relationship? I'm not sure that I deserve to get anything that will make me feel better."_

"_Why do you think that you don't deserve to feel better?"_

"_Because all of this is my fault. Brooke being dead. Peyton trying to kill herself. Peyton being the hell out of me. I brought it on myself."_

"_Haley you can't blame yourself." Christy said trying to get the girl to listen._

_Haley hated these sessions and she didn't believe a word that came out of the older woman's mouth. "Oh would you look at that. I have to go."_

"_Haley…"_

"_The hour is up." Haley said pointing at the clock. "We can start here next time." With that Haley left the room._

Haley shuddered at the thought of that session as she did whenever she thought about her talks with Christy. She knew these sessions or talks were supposed to help but it didn't feel like they were. Haley sighed again and turned to curl up on her side as silent tears began to fall.

"I just want to feel better," she cried out softly into the empty room.

**XXXXXXXXX**

Peyton pulled her leather bound journal back out once she got in her room after Rachel dropped her off.

**Journal,**

**Things just keep getting more and more interesting around here. I talked to Haley today. I mean talked not yelled at, not fought with, but talked to her. I don't really know why I did. She's dead to me now. I don't care if she is ok or not. But I guess part of growing up is being civil even when you don't want to.**

**Rachel is an awesome person you know. I seriously don't know where I'd be if I didn't have her around. I'm starting to feel things for her. I don't really know if I should or not. I think it could be just what you feel for someone after they save your life. Because really…I couldn't be falling for her falling for her. Could I?**

**Peyton.**

Peyton quickly closed her journal and placed it on her nightstand. _Gosh. This cannot be happening._ She thought as she lay back on her bed to sleep. _But if it is…it wouldn't be that bad. _She thought with a big smile as she drifted to sleep.

Nathan parked his car and walked up to his apartment. When he walked in he looked to his left at a picture that he had taken of Haley just a few days before.

"I love this girl. But will she ever be able to love me back?" He wondered out loud then sat the picture back down and went to bed.

**Ok so, as always I'm sorry if that sucked. Tell me what you think. Just a little note about Haley. I know that she doesn't seem very "Haley-ish" in this. But please remember that she just lost someone she loved and she's dealing with a great amount of guilt. So she's kind of Pod-Haley. So yeah please review and remember to leave opinions on couples.**


	4. A Break

Rachel and Nathan sat at their normal table at the back of Karen's café. The two had made it a habit of getting together every couple of weeks to just talk and spend some time away from the girls and the rest of life. Neither one would ever say it out loud but _taking care_ of Haley and Peyton had taken a toll on them.

The effects of the past few months were clearly visible on Nathan's worn face. His eyes were dark and tired from the lack of sleep and the constant worry that had consumed him since Brooke's death. He had mastered the art of smiling on cue and acting as if everything was ok. His ability to act _fine_ was getting so good that one would think he got lessons from Brooke Davis herself. He had always admired that about Brooke. Her life could be falling to pieces but no one would be able to tell, most times not even her best friends. He wasn't that good, probably never would be. Rachel could always see through his _fineness_. That's why he always looked forward to his times with her. The times where they were alone and he could just be Nathan. He didn't have to be the strong figure, the protector, the one who knew everything would be ok. He could just be himself the worried, tired, teenage boy who was dealing with the death of a friend. Rachel was his source of strength and he took pride in being hers when and if she needed it.

Rachel sat across from Nathan sipping a cup of coffee. Her eyes no longer seemed as tired and defeated as they had just a few weeks ago. She was beginning to cope and to move on, probably because Peyton was doing the same thing. No matter how much she hated to admit it, the way she felt depended greatly on how a certain tall blonde was feeling at any particular time. This whole situation took a greater toll on her body then she ever could have imagined. After all she is Rachel Gattina, nothing gets to her. She could have never dreamed how wrong that notion was. Rachel valued these times with Nathan just as much as he did. It was good to have someone who could relate to you in a way that no one else could. She could still remember the first time she really had to lean on Nathan.

_Nathan opened his apartment door to find a drenched, crying Rachel standing on his doorstep. "Rachel what's wrong?" He asked as he moved aside to let the girl in the house._

"_I…I…didn't know where else to go." She choked out in between sobs. Nathan ran to the bathroom grabbed a towel and quickly returned wrapping it around the girl's shaking shoulders._

"_What happened?" He asked panic growing as he led her to the couch. Rachel sat on the couch staring off into space not saying a word. "Rachel…talk to me." He gently urged._

"_I…I…I almost lost her today." Rachel said a whole new batch of tears flowing out of her eyes and down her cheeks. Rachel tried to shake away the vision of a limp Peyton in her arms. Yeah Peyton was good and awake when she had found her in her room and yeah she still had a hand full of pills but come to find out she had already down 3 weeks worth of antidepressants along with a half a bottle of vodka. _

"_Who?" Nathan asked almost afraid to hear the answer as he put his arm around the girl to try and calm her shaking._

"_Peyton." Rachel managed to answer as she fell into Nathan's embrace. "She tried to…" Rachel started but couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence. "And if I wouldn't have gotten there when I did she could have…" Rachel started but again broke down not being able to finish her thought. She didn't need to. Nathan knew what she was saying. His worst fear for Peyton had almost come true. His heart broke thinking of the once strong, tough, sassy girl that he knew so well being at the point where she felt she had no reason to live. His grip on Rachel got tighter._

"_Shh…shh," he cooed in her ear until she fell asleep in his arms. It wasn't until the next morning that he got the full story from Rachel. Peyton had od'd on antidepressant and passed out in Rachel's arms. Rachel called 911 and she was rushed to the hospital where her stomach was pumped and she was placed on 24 hour suicide watch._

Rachel shook her head wanting to do anything she could to rid herself of the memories of that night and the days following closely after. She looked at Nathan who hadn't said anything the entire time they'd been there and smiled. Sometimes it was like this, neither of them saying a word, other times it was the opposite. They would talk and talk and couldn't shut up even if they tried.

Moments later their silence was interrupted by Karen refilling their drinks. The older woman looked down at the pair and smiled. "You two are amazing." She said her voice full of pride. Nathan and Rachel looked at her confused. "Looking out for Haley and Peyton the way you do. It's so selfless. Not many people would do it. I'm so proud of you guys." She explained still smiling at them

"Thanks," they both said shyly. Karen nodded then left them alone.

"Well we always knew I was amazing…but finding out you are too really is shocking." Rachel joked, smiling at Nathan.

"No you never were really that amazing everyone just lied to you." Nathan shot back playfully."

"Ouch. That one hurt." She said laughing. "But in all seriousness Nate, how is she?"

Nathan released a heavy sigh before he spoke. "How should I know? She doesn't talk to me. She doesn't let me in. She doesn't _want_ me to help her. The truth is she's just the same as the day of the accident if not worse…but she's just gotten better at hiding it." Nathan said sadly looking down at the table.

Rachel nodded that she understood what he was saying. "So I guess that means you two aren't together, together?"

"No," Nathan said shaking his head. "I would love to be with her like that Rachel. She's such a great girl and I would give anything to just make her happy. But…" He said trailing off not knowing exactly how to explain it.

"I'm sorry Nate. Just give her some more time. I'm sure she'll come around." She said giving the boy across from her a reassuring smile.

"Thanks Rach. How's Peyton, I mean honestly how is she?"

"I actually think she's doing better. I mean I guess anything is better then downing pills and vodka but yeah she's doing really well." Rachel said not being able to help the large smile on her face as she talked about Peyton. "The boxing is really helping her more than I thought it would. She seems a lot calmer since she started." Rachel smirked unknowingly as she thought about Peyton beating the hell out of a bag.

Nathan looked at his friend then got a smirk of his own. "You like her don't you."

"I think that's been established by the past few months, Nate." Rachel said not getting what he meant.

"No, Rachel, I mean you _like_ her." He clarified for her giving her a knowing look. Rachel opened her mouth to say something but Nathan put up his hand and cut her off. "Don't try and deny it. It's written all of your face. It started with that look when you were talking about her. You know the look that says 'I love that girl with all my heart. I'm so proud of the progress she's making.' Then when you started talking about her and boxing I could tell you were thinking about a sweaty, nicely toned Peyton Sawyer because you got that pervy teenaged boy grin on your face. Actually you have again now." Nathan said with a laugh.

"I do not look like a teenaged boy." Rachel said defending herself. Nathan raised his eyebrow at her. "Oh my God…I did didn't I?" She said starting to freak out a little bit causing Nathan to crack up even more. "Shut up this isn't funny. I can so not be perving on Peyton. I mean seriously."

"Why not? It's really kinda hot." Nathan said now being the one with a pervy smirk. After a few seconds of them both enjoying the mental image of Peyton and her new hobby, his face turned serious. "You know it's ok if you like her. I've personally been expecting it to happen all along." Nathan said placing his hand on top of the redhead's.

Rachel looked down. There was no point in denying that her feelings for Peyton were more than friendly. "It's not ok Nathan." She said sadly. "It's not ok for the very same reason that it will never be ok. It's the same reason why neither of us will ever get the girl we want." She looked him in the eyes and he knew she was right. "We'll never get them because of…"

"_Brooke."_ They both said at the same time.

It was now Nathan's turn to be the voice of optimism. "You don't know that Rachel. I've seen the way that Peyton looks at you. We just have to be patient. It could all work out for us."

"I guess you're right. It doesn't really matter if I ever get to _be_ with her. As long as I can help her get through this and be happy, I'm ok with that." Rachel said smiling.

"That attitude right there is exactly why she is going to fall for you." Nathan said sweetly causing Rachel to blush. "That is so cute. You really do like her." He said smiling.

"Yeah…I really do."


	5. Turning Point

**Hey guys! I'm back with another update. No one reviewed the last chapter so I guess I'll go back to begging for reviews? Haha. No but seriously I really do like feedback…so pretty please with cherries on top? ) So I'm really excited about where this story is going for the next few chapters. I'm actually kinda scared about telling you guys that just in case it doesn't live up to my expectations but yeah I really hope it does. So yeah keep reading and as always please please leave reviews and comments.**

**Disclaimer: Same from the beginning.**

Rachel pulled into the gym parking lot, pulling into her normal spot. She looked at the building she had become a regular at over the past month or so and shook her head in disbelief.

"_She wants you to what?" Rachel asked looking at the blonde dumbfounded._

"_She wants me to take up boxing." Peyton said turning away from her drawing to face her friend who was resting on her stomach in the middle of Peyton's bed._

"_But why? Has she not seen Haley's face?" Rachel asked sticking her tongue out playfully. _

_Peyton shrugged in response. "Apparently she thinks that it will be a constructive way to release my feelings." Rachel nodded saying that she understood. "But really I think giving Haley a busted lip and black eye was very constructive." Peyton added with an innocent smile._

"_Violence doesn't solve anything." Rachel said in a motherly tone but not being able to hide the smile on her face._

"_But it sure makes you feel a heck of a lot better," Peyton replied with a wink. _

"_So are you going to do it? The boxing I mean." Rachel asked seriously, now sitting Indian style._

"_I don't know," Peyton said shrugging. "I mean it couldn't hurt, right? It'd be kind of fun too." Rachel nodded not wanting to say anything. Peyton didn't say anything for a few minutes. "Would you do it with me?" Peyton asked her eyes almost pleading._

"_Of course I will."_

That was a little over a month ago and Rachel still couldn't believe the impact this gym and what happened inside it was having on her best friend. She grabbed her bag and made her way into the small gym.

She walked in the door and immediately saw her tall blonde friend already working the hanging punching bag. Rachel stood against the wall watching the other girl and couldn't help but remember their first day.

"_So here we are." Rachel said as they walked in the front door trying to lighten Peyton's mood a little bit._

"_Yeah…here we are." Peyton said looking around the small interior obviously a little nervous. _

_An older man, maybe around 45 came up to the two girls smiling. "I'm guessing that one of you is Peyton?" He said looking between the two of them. Peyton smiled a little and gave a slight nod. "I'm Joe and you are?" He asked looking at Rachel._

"_Oh hi, I'm Rachel." She answered with a smile. "It's ok that I'm here right? Christy didn't know I was coming but…" Rachel said trailing off when she saw the older man smiling at her._

"_Yes it's fine. Let's get you two some gloves then get started. Shall we?" He asked as he walked off with the girls following close behind._

_After about an hour the girls had their gloves on and had been taught a few basic punches._

"_Let's try some stuff in the ring," Joe said as he climbed into the ring. "Peyton why don't you come in first." He said as he held the ropes apart to make it easier for her to climb in. Peyton nodded and entered the ring._

"_What I want you to do is hit these mitts." Joe instructed holding up his mitt covered hands. Peyton nodded that she understood the instructions. "Ok go."_

_Peyton gave a small punch with her right hand then with her left and looked up at Joe as if to ask if she was doing it right. _

"_Hit them Peyton. Hit them hard. Think of everything in your life that is screwed up or that has hurt you and fight back. Hit it, Peyton. Make it feel your pain."_

_Joe put his hands back up. This time Peyton hit them a little harder. "Think about them Peyton. Picture them. Everyone and everything that has broken you, hurt you, pissed you off. Think about it and use it."_

_That last bit of urging Peyton needed before she slipped into her own thoughts and laid into the mitts and mad in front of her. She landed a left, then right, then left. Each blow a little harder than the last._

_Peyton closed her eyes and images of her dad leaving, of her mom dying, of Ellie dying, all flashed in front of her. Old scars that she didn't even know she had were moving her to hit harder and harder. Then the more recent hurts started flooding her mind. Brooke picking Haley. Haley hurting Brooke. Brooke curled against her chest crying her heart out because of something Haley had done. Brooke telling her they couldn't hang out as much because Haley didn't like it. Tears were now falling down her face, but she didn't care, the tears where like fuel to her fire, causing her hits to be a little harder and faster. The phone call from Taylor, telling her what had happened to Brooke flooded her thoughts now. Then running to the intersection in the rain to see for herself. The blood on the sidewalk, Brooke's blood. Glass shattered all over the road. Peyton was now visibly shaking from her sobs but she kept punching. Kept fighting. Trying to make something feel her pain._

_Rachel watched from outside the ring, trying fight back her own set of tears. Her own thoughts clouded by images of Peyton laying in a hospital bed after having her stomach pumped. She watched as Peyton landed punch after punch. She watched as tear after tear fell from Peyton's cheeks and landed on the mat with a silent drip…drip…drip. Before she knew her face was covered in tears that she could no longer hold in._

_Peyton was now hitting so hard that she was backing Joe into the corner, but she didn't notice. All she could see or hear was Brooke's funeral, her coffin being slowly lowered into the ground, inch by agonizing inch. She could hear the shovel full of dirt hit the coffin as they began to fill the hole. She was gone. Brooke Davis her other half was really gone. The realization hit her like a ton of bricks which caused to stop punching and fall into the arms on the older man. Violent sobs racked her body as she finally began to release years of built up anger and hurt._

"You just gonna stand there all day?" Peyton asked smiling over at Rachel pulling her out of her thoughts.

"No." Rachel said smiling back as she made her way to the girl. "You do realize that you now spend more time in this place than you do in your own room."

"I know. And your point?" Peyton said grinning.

"I don't have one." Rachel said getting her gloves out of her bag.

"I don't know why I'm shocked…you never do."

"Hey," Rachel whined playfully slapping the other girl on the arm.

"You hit like a girl." Peyton said laughing at the shorter girl.

"Oh you just wait until we get in the ring." Rachel said trying her best to look mad.

"Uh oh, I'm scared now."

"You should be." Rachel said climbing into the ring punching at the air and moving her feet, which sent Peyton into a fit of laughter.

"Alright, show me what you got Ali," Peyton said after she calmed herself and climbed into the ring.

"You got it."

The two girls started circling each other each looking for an opening. Rachel threw the first punch with was blocked effortlessly by Peyton, who in turn connected with Rachel's jaw with her right fist, sending the red head stumbling back a couple of steps. Rachel shook it off with ease and they started circling again. Rachel threw another punch this time landing it on the side of Peyton's head gear.

"Looks like someone is getting a little better," Peyton taunted with a smirk.

"You know it," Rachel smirked back.

The girls boxed around for about ten more minutes before Peyton backed Rachel into a corner and started laying into her mid section. Rachel finally got her hands on the blonde's shoulders and was able to push her off.

"You know Peyt, if you wanted to get me into a corner you didn't have to beat me into one." Rachel said with a wink catching Peyton off guarding, which allowing her to connect with a left then a right.

They decided to take a little breather each girl going to her respective corner and grabbing some water. Rachel grabbed her bottle then turned to see Peyton leaning against the ropes in her own corner. Her arms draped across the top ropes.

Rachel's eyes took in Peyton from head to toe. She was wearing a black sports bra and white boxing shorts which showed off her new perfectly sculpted boxer's abs. Rachel unconsciously licked her lips as she ran her eyes back up Peyton's body.

"Not looking so bad yourself, Rach." Peyton said knowingly a smirk playing across her lips.

"What?" Rachel said blushing a little as she realized she had been caught gawking.

"I said…that you're looking good these days." Peyton said as she pushed herself off of the ropes, causing Rachel to back up more into her own corner.

"Thanks," Rachel said kicking herself for letting Peyton make her this nervous. No one ever made her this nervous and she wasn't liking that Peyton was. "Boxing looks good on you." Rachel said trying to regain some of her lost power.

"Thanks." Peyton said slowly walking toward Rachel that smirk still plastered on her face. Peyton suddenly stopped in the middle of the ring almost like she had lost her train of thought. "So are we gonna box?"

Rachel looked at her like she was crazy but then nodded and went back to the center of the ring. It was a lot the first round with a lot of circling with each girl getting in an equal amount of hits. Then about five minutes into it something came over both girls causing the match to become much more heated and physical. Punches were being thrown and landed at a quick pace. Both girls were sweating and breathing heavily.

Rachel somehow managed to back Peyton into a corner and started going after the midsection that she had been admiring earlier. Peyton pushed the shorter girl off of her but instead of the corner she managed to quickly get Rachel backed up into the corner, something that Rachel didn't expect at all.

Rachel looked at Peyton and noticed something different in the girl's eyes than the normal "eye of the tiger." This look was different almost playful and flirtatious. Before Rachel knew what was happening Peyton had her hands on the ropes on either side of Rachel and their lips had met in a quick kiss.

Rachel looked at Peyton pleasantly surprised by the turn this match had suddenly taken.

"You're looking really good lately Rach," Peyton said softly as she leaned in to kiss her again. Rachel smiled into the kiss as she put her gloved hands behind Peyton's neck pulling her closer to deepen the kiss.

A couple minutes later Peyton broke the kiss resting her forehead on Rachel's. Neither girl could erase the grins off their faces.

"We should do this more often." Rachel said smiling up at Peyton.

"Which part beating the hell out of each other or kissing?" Peyton asked with a smirk.

"Both." Rachel said quickly kissing Peyton again then ducking under the taller girl's arms and exiting the ring.

Peyton laughed a little then asked, "Where are you going?"

"Shower." Rachel said simply. "Wanna come?" She added with a wink before picking up her bag.

"Oh yeah," Peyton responded eyeing the retreating figure. Peyton quickly jumped out of the ring knowing that today was going to be a huge turning point in her life. A smiled crawled across her face as she realized that for once in a really long time she was truly happy.


End file.
